


Burning the Candle at Both Ends Forever

by ineedthislikeaholeinthehead



Series: Til Death Do Us Part [1]
Category: American Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, The Hobbit RPF
Genre: Blow Job, Engagement, Established Relationship, M/M, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-23
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-08 16:48:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3216326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead/pseuds/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Richard's made a New Years resolution: by the end of the year, Lee Pace will be his, forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Ring

**Author's Note:**

> I needed RichLee taking it to the next level, in my life. 
> 
> It goes with out saying that I own nothing, Richard and Lee are not openly in a real life relationship (though it would certainly be very nice of they ever were!) and whatever is going on with them has nothing to do with this complete work of my imagination.

Lee wasn't materialistic in the average sense of the word. He wasn't obsessive about fancy status items or flashy trends. But he had a specific sort of style- something cultivated from a life lived, if not perfectly, then cocooned from the harsher parts of life. He wasn't materialistic simply because he had been provided with decent options, and he could instinctively collect quality.

If asked directly- though it was not the sort of thing people tended to want to ask while in his presence- he would freely admit that he had lived a somewhat pampered existence, especially considering his chosen field, where statistically speaking, the majority of professionals could easily find themselves out of work at any time. 

Richard wasn't going to claim abject poverty, but the trajectory that had brought the two actors together had been much more of a climb for him than it had been for Lee. 

And it, like the age gap, wasn't typically an issue. Once you get past a certain age, a few years (or a bit closer to a decade than Richard liked to admit) really didn't make that much of a difference in relationships. 

But, every once in a while, there was an occasion where their different life experiences collided, and, not exactly made problems, just, caused some stress. Well, caused Richard stress, in any case, because it was a rare thing indeed for anyone, Richard included, to see Lee circling anything near stressed. 

Maybe it was the weed. Their friends liked to joke about the two rural New York hemp farmers- but in truth, there were a few well maintained plants in a somewhat complex hydroponic set up happily growing in the basement. And the way Lee spoke about them teetered on the verge of parental pride. 

Richard wasn't averse to an occasional joint, but Lee was virtually a complete stoner- and the sort of philosophical-this-is-a-way-of-life type Richard had previously assumed only existed in cheesy movies and on the beaches of California. 

Unfortunately, home grown, organic, fancy named strain weed was NOT going to alleviate Richard's current anxiety. 

He had made a definitive decision during their last vacation; the sort of thing that, if he wasn't careful, could be completely botched and accidentally blurted out. He didn't want to call it a resolution, but this year, Richard was determined to convince Lee to marry him.

This was something Richard had not seen himself doing with Lee. He had certainly known he was attracted to Lee, and the blatant attraction Lee returned him was flattering to say the least. But Richard had been convinced that the breakneck speed at which they had careened into each other on set was doomed. And, frankly, this sex had been so good, he was sure it was simply meant to be one of those things that burnt hot and fast, and he relished every second of their time together, sure that the end was looming. 

Richard had always assumed that he would eventually settle down with a woman, have the family he had always dreamed of in the standard way. This thing with Lee was fun, and exhilarating, but things that good could never last. He understood, the candle that burns at both ends- and Richard recognized the white hot passion he'd felt from the first time they'd drunkenly crashed into each other as the sort of flame that burnt at both ends- burns twice as fast.

Then, things somehow changed between him and Lee. One day, Richard simply woke up in the morning and Lee was still there, and it occurred to him that Lee was always still there. Not pressuring, not badgering, simply happily part of Richard's life as far as Richard would allow.

Not that Richard trusted it, even after realizing how emotionally invested he was. Even after moving to New York, they technically had separate homes- though there was seldom a night where they were both in the same state that they weren't in the same bed- and of course there was the tricky question of what sort of labels to use. 

Richard hadn't ever really liked being someone's boyfriend. There was something about the term that felt constraining, but not permanent, and he would bristle even when the girls he was seeing tried to put it on him. With men, he had always considered any sort of sexual interaction more of a dalliance than a serious option.

There had been no formal conversation about how he felt, Lee had simply never used the word in front of him. He'd simply introduced him to new faces as "my Rich," with a crooked smile and an arm around his waist that explained it all. And, that seemed to fit for Richard, who was finally at the point where actually holding hands with Lee while introducing him felt safe.

Things were complicated for Richard, figuring out what was going on between them. As right as things felt, he was terrified of letting his guard down, he didn't want it to feel permanent, because it would hurt when things went south. It was scary how good it felt- he was always ready for the other shoe to fall. And when they inevitably did, where was that going to leave Richard, who cringed at the idea of being put into a preference box. 

He had loads of gay friends, and Lee had introduced him to more. In all honesty, he had casually dated his fair share. But, even when he was completely satisfied with the idea of sleeping with no one other than Lee for the rest of his life (a sentiment he was almost positive Lee did not return) the term gay just didn't apply. 

He loved- yes, definitely loved- Lee, but that didn't mean he'd stopped liking women. He liked the effect he had over them, and the sweetness and their perspectives and the different challenges they could create and experience, and he still greatly enjoyed their softness, smallness, and curves. 

As wonderful as loving Lee was, it would never "convert" Richard to gay. But Lee somehow understood that, in a way no woman Richard had ever dated had felt about his attraction to men. In fact, it had been the breaking point in more than one relationship- there was a certain struggle in dating monoromantics, (a word he could have only learned once he'd been exposed to Lee's much more aware and fluid existence) in that they- or at least the gay men and straight women he had personally been with-were convinced that they were what would finally make Richard decide which side he was on. 

Lee understood what he was before he'd had words for it, but he'd settled in on Pansexual and while he didn't say anything at all publicly, it wasn't out of shame. It was hard to believe Lee could be ashamed of anything, so comfortable he was in his own skin. 

Richard thought bisexual was more fitting for himself, but when he was exactly and precisely sure about it, he didn't know if he would feel as comfortable remaining so publicly silent like Lee. He was all for privacy, but once something was public, he wasn't sure he could deal with mislabeling as easily as Lee could. 

And in the end, it all came back around to the fact that he felt incredibly lucky to be with Lee. He had taken a journey of self and mutual discovery with this man, that had been rocky and terrifying at first, and while he had been absolutely convinced that the good moments would end, they hadn't. Things weren't always easy, but those feelings that he'd written off as folly and infatuation never wore off, and Richard accepted that Lee was just as head over heels in love with him. 

And, things were just as perfect as anything that was still interesting could be, and for all the doubts about navigating his world, there were absolutely none left when it came to Lee. He was the love of Richard's life, and that deserved something special.

That deserved a ceremony and a title and to stir things up a little in the world.

Richard wanted to get this right, and as antiquated as it felt on some levels, it deserved a ring. 

Which is where Richard was struggling. How do you find something that isn't boorish, or over the top, but can still convince a man that you're worthy of sharing the rest of their life? 

If the last few years had been convincing Richard that he and Lee were perfect for each other, ring shopping was the final test, questioning if Richard really knew enough about Lee to be sure. 

He'd spent hours online, searching through hundreds of rings that were too cheap, too gaudy, too extravagant, too feminine. 

Anything remotely decent was exorbitant, and Richard had to remind himself on more than one occasion that what he was doing held a symbolic value higher than any price tag. He took his fair share of deep breaths, reminded himself of the difference between American dollars and real pounds, and knew that anything he spent was a pittance compared to what a yes to this question would mean. 

He finally decided the only way to go was custom design, and because he was a bit bullheaded and Lee had a way of finding out anything that didn't stay strictly within the confines of Richard's head, he spent a long time looking for a discreet, talented and upscale jeweler instead of asking for recommendations. In the end, he was very happy with his new Jeweler, Jerry.

They spent hours over email, going back and forth- Richard using all the jeweler's terminology he'd learned in his exhaustive search to describe what he was looking for, until Jerry had finally picked up the phone and been a bit blunt with him.

"Is Lee home right now?" He asked. 

"No."

"So, here's what you're going to do. Describe how he makes you feel. And refrain from using the words "carat" or "band"."

It took Richard a minute. He was a quiet man, Lee teased him about how long and hard he'd had to work to get the words "I" "love" and "you" to come out of his mouth in the right order. The sentiment was there, but vocalizing feelings was terrifying. He preferred to simply know how he felt with out quantifying it with words that would never be enough. 

"You still with me, Richard?" Jerry asked from miles away on the phone. 

"Just.. Trying to verbalize that."

"Ok. Well, I'm here to help you say it with gold and diamonds, but before we get there, I need to know what you're trying to say."

"Well, I don't think I like gold. I mean, for him. Maybe platinum? Though that does seem a bit.. Eh. White gold? It would be nice... Depending on the band size-"

"You're a traditionalist, you want gold- but we aren't getting into that right now, because you're going to tell me about Lee first."

"You're very pushy, Jerry. Has any one ever told you that?"

"I can afford to be. I'm very good at what I do. No more stalling. Tell me about this love of your life."

And once he started, it came flooding out. He'd always been uncomfortable with gushing romantics- emotions were useful things that he considered himself in control of- it got scary when he lost control and they started rushing out of him. 

But it was exactly that sort of loss of control that had made him so sure about Lee. It was Lee sitting there when he was overwhelmed, never disappointed at his loss of control over those... Feelings... He was simply and perfectly there, ready to support Richard and fill him back up when he was absolutely empty. 

Lee just felt, without having to deconstruct everything, and he was the only person who had ever wanted Richard to feel like that too.

An hour later, Jerry was still on the phone- Richard realized he had severely crossed the line of a simple ring purchase, and apologized for using Jerry as a therapist. 

"You would be surprised at how often that happens."

"I guess you're dealing with a lot of nervous people on the precipice of marriage?"

"It brings up a lot of issues. But I'll tell you something that's against my best interests."

"Ok."

"The best ring in the world doesn't mean shit if you don't have the feelings to back it up."

"Hope you don't tell all your customers that."

"Well, I wouldn't be in business very long if I only sold rings to people who loved each other. But, I wouldn't want to be in business if I didn't get to do it for people in love, sometimes."

"Jerry, you're a softie."

"You too, Richard."

He'd already joked about it, but it wasn't until that moment that Richard realized just how personal he had let this transaction become, and Jerry graciously killed the awkward silence by promising him a design by the end of the week. 

When the design came- a ping in his email inbox in the middle of the night that he had to sneak out of bed to go look at- it was glorious. He tapped out an instant reply "yes, that's it exactly!"

Two weeks later, on a night when Lee was conveniently out of town, Richard made his way to 47th street with a cheque representing a small fortune to meet up with Jerry.

At 6'3" Richard was used to places feeling cramped, but Jerry had some how created a poshness in his tiny space. When he unveiled the actual ring, Richard was speechless. 

Not to say there were no words to describe the ring- but perfect, the stuff dreams are made of, and heavenly just weren't enough. He was able to spit out "This is glorious." with out too many tears.

"Exactly the sort of thing you have to say "yes" to, I think." Jerry said.

"Here's hoping." Richard said while signing and handing over the cheque and greedily grabbing the box."Thank you."

He spent the rest of the night alternating between looking for places around his flat where he could hide the thing, and taking it out, staring at it under different lights. 

In the end, the box sat open facing him on the nightstand. Richard stared at the perfect ring, thought about the perfect man it was for, and simply thought "how the fuck am I going to pull this off?"


	2. Tonight's the night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After months of preparing, Richard knows that tonight is the perfect night to ask Lee to marry him.

Richard couldn't get enough of Lee's laugh. He tried to ignore his brain pulling up the catalogue of insane and embarrassing things he had done to earn it in the past and just enjoy it. He was unapologetically addicted to the way Lee looked when he was giggling his ass off just like this. 

While he stared at Lee, Richard's hand crept into his pocket, his fingers clasping around the velvet box that had barely left his side for the past two months.

'Tonight's the night.' He thought, for the sixth night in a row. Richard felt his heart pounding in his chest as the box started sliding up his pocket. 

It was a great restaurant, they had the best- and most secluded- table. They were both two glasses into a superb red, well fed and happily buzzed while waiting for desert. The view was spectacular, but all Richard could concentrate on was how bloody gorgeous Lee looked, how much he wanted to reach out, and pull Lee's lips to his own. 

PDA of that sort wasn't part of their normal routine, but a successful proposal would probably elicit the desired effect of a kiss. Richard's excitement over the prospect of a romantic, public, kiss was distracting him from the stratospheric levels of anxiety he was currently experiencing over the words he was about to speak.

And then, the moment he'd been waiting for, was gone. 

"Ready for dessert?" Their waitress chimed in. When had she gotten there? Richard realized he had gotten tunnel vision. Anything could have been happening while he'd been momentarily entranced. Which wasn't exactly a rare occurrence for him. The world could fall to pieces, but as long as Lee was smiling, Richard was pretty sure he would be ok.

She placed a piece of chocolate cake that Lee was adamant Richard would love, between them and stood there, waiting.

"I am so sorry." She said, though she couldn't possibly know what she had just ruined. "I know you two are off the clock... And I don't mean to be unprofessional, but... I'm working on my dissertation on how the friendship between Tolkien and Lewis affected literature... And you two were so amazing in The Hobbit-- I just couldn't stop myself from saying thank you for your performances."

Lee's eyes lit up. He was so much more susceptible to compliments than Richard, who had a tendency to fear insincerity, especially when he was frustrated. 

"Oh my god, Thank you, Jennifer!" And of course Lee would remember their waitress's name- to be fair, from Lee's perspective they were simply going to try that new place with all the great reviews- not 5 nights late on finding out the answer to a completely life altering question. 

"Rich! We have a real life Tolkien scholar giving us cake, can you believe it?"

Richard gave her as much of a smile as he could muster, and let out a succinct, sour "Thank you, so much." 

It was enough to make Jennifer blush and, thankfully, leave. But the mood was gone. He'd have to think up something else for tomorrow. 'On to day seven.' Richard thought to himself as he begrudgingly enjoyed a forkful of cake that would have tasted much, much better if it had been fed to him by his fiancée.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, sorry about the short chapter- we're almost there, I promise!
> 
> Wouldn't it be terrible if Lee said no? (As if any one could possibly do that!) 
> 
> I'm out of it today. Anyways. Hope you enjoyed!


	3. I'll make it up to you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Richard finally gets his answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I actually got this posted today! I feel a little sad now that I've finished the story.
> 
> I need to think up some other fun things for Richard and Lee.... But what?!

"You're being a real pill tonight, Rich." Lee said, crawling into bed next to him. 

"Oh, am I?" He asked, knowing full well how much of a pill he was being. 

The cab ride home from dinner had not been fun, his mood darkened by the over-fullness of chocolate cake and the last glass of wine.

"You didn't even say goodnight to Jennifer."

"Heaven forbid I forget to French the waitress goodnight!" He snapped. Lee laughed. Grumpy Richard was one of his favorite flavors.

"She wanted to ask your perspective about a couple things. I got her email address for you." He handed Richard a napkin with Jennifer's contact info scribbled in the scrunched up script of some one used to making copious notes on the limited margins of textbooks.

Richard tossed the note onto his nightstand. His heart fluttered, partially with excitement at the thought of gold ring he'd hastily thrown into the drawer whole Lee was in the loo, and partially with frustration over the fact that the ring wasn't yet sitting where it should be, on Lee's left hand.

He was pulled back to the reality of his grumpy mood by a 14 stone brunet puppy jumping into his lap.

"What's wrong, dwarf-King?" Richard rolled his eyes. The nick-name had gotten old quickly, because Lee only used it to imply that he didn't want to put up with Richard's moodiness.

"Nothing. I'm just a sour old man tonight."

"Well, how do I change that?" He asked, a sly smile creeping over Lee's gorgeous mouth. 

"It's not your job to make me feel better." 

"Baby, you can call me Ponce De Leon of it will bring back the guy who was chatting me up over hors d'oeuvres."

"Ponce De Leon never found the fountain of youth. He was just another racist Spaniard."

"Cut me some slack, Rich. I'm drunk and offering you a blow job."

"Because the best time to put my genitals near your teeth is when you're inebriated."

Lee forcefully pressed his lips to Richard's, instantaneously melting away the first layer of frozen disappointment from his body. 

"Whatever's you're not inclined to tell me about, it might look better afterwards."

And Richard wasn't as adamant a believer in sexual healing as Lee was- the boy would rather fuck than set a broken leg- but who was he to deny Lee the chance to try? He kissed Lee back. 

"Worth a shot." He tells him and Lee moves his lips down Richard's neck, his hand sliding under the sweats he was wearing as pajamas and expertly coaxing Richard's cock to attention. 

His lips moved lower, through the chest hair that drove Lee crazy, stopping to tease one of his nipples with a playful nibble before blazing a trail down Richard's stomach with his tongue and finally landing, as promised, on the tip of his now fully erect member. 

Wrapping his long fingers around the base, Lee took his time inching Richard's thick, throbbing cock into his mouth. 

He was a champion at knowing exactly how much teasing Richard could take before giving him more, but he never gave more than he absolutely needed, always leaving Richard yearning. 

He ran his fingers through Lee's hair, tipping his hips for just a little more of Lee's warmth, and he felt the fingers release from his cock , graciously replaced by soft lips and a wet tongue. 

He was thrusting against Lee's throat within minutes and in his post coital afterglow, he had to admit that things did seem better. 

He was well fed, well drunk and snuggling up in bed next to the most gorgeous, cock sucking expert in the world. 

True, he didn't know if he would have that honor forever, but he did know that they loved each other, so how bad could life really be?

And then, while he was kissing Lee's neck, the words came out of his mouth- like a slow motion horror sequence, he heard his own voice saying "Lee, please marry me."

And then, an awestruck silence that felt like eternity. What the fuck was he thinking? Proposing to some one, with his second best sweats still hanging low on his thighs? What the FUCK was he thinking? 

Lee graciously giggled. "Sure Rich, whatever you'd like."

"You don't believe me?" All of a sudden Richard was insulted that his admittedly horrid proposal wasn't good enough.

"Everyone blurts things out sometimes, At Least that wasn't some one else's name."

"Lee, I do want to marry you." He insisted, pulling his slacks over his hips.

"I get it...Someday...that's good to know." 

"Someday, soon." He said, pulling the engagement ring out of his nightstand and handing the closed box to Lee.

He opened it.

"Oh my fucking God." He nearly whispered. 

"Well?"

"You're not fucking with me, are you?"

"Does it look like I'm fucking around, mate?"

"Do you want me to answer that?"

"I'd prefer an answer to the first question."

"Oh god, Rich- yes! Yes, fuck yes!" 

Lee says, before kissing Richard, full force.

When they stop- minutes later, Lee puts on the ring, and then cuddles up between Richard's arms so they can both admire the way it looks on his hand.

"That was the absolute worst proposal in history." Lee giggled. 

Still admiring how goddamned perfect that ring looks on him, Richard kissed Lee's ear, and said, "Well, I suppose I'll have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanna be absolutely honest, I only wrote this because I wanted to write Lee giving Richard a blow job. My skills in PWP are NOT very strong.
> 
> Hopefully, I'll get a little better at the smutty stuff in my next fic (whenever that may be!) 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> I just wanted to thank my absolutely wonderful fiancée, who not only caught quite a few typos in this story, but also told me what kind of engagement ring to get (you know, just in case I wanted to ask her :p) because if I had had to go through what poor Rich did, we still probably wouldn't be engaged!


End file.
